A cute little lady approaches you in a bar and asks, “Will you buy me a drink?”
Or you’re talking with a rare beauty, or maybe dancing, and she gives you the old, “Are you going to buy me a drink?”
What do you do? What do you say? Do you buy her the drink?
If you’ve been around the block a little, you’ve probably come to realize that it’s usually not a good idea to respond to these drink requests in a positive fashion. For many reasons…
1.) Club drinks are usually very expensive and will drain your wallet fast.
2.) She may not be attracted to you at all and simply be using you to finance her night out.
3.) She may already be out with a guy, and once she gets her drink, she returns to him and completely ignores you (it happens).
4.) Most importantly, buying her a drink runs the risk of framing your interaction as one where you’re seeking her approval! You are the pursuer and she is the prize that must be won.
But it’s also possible she could actually like you. It’s possible this is her “line” and she’s trying to meet you. Maybe she doesn’t even care about the drink. Not probable, but possible. Or maybe you’ve been talking with her for a while and you’re feeling a little chemistry.
Hmm, should you be safe and not do it, or take a chance and do it anyhow?
How can you protect yourself and your finances, without appearing rude or cheap or weird? And how can you refuse her request without driving her away?
The trick here is to turn the tables, and not make it about buying a drink to pick her up, but about her asking for a drink because she wants to pick YOU up!
This is a subtle difference. In one scenario, you’re putting yourself at a disadvantage. In the other, you’re making it so she has to prove to you she’s worth your time and money.
So let’s say the woman asks you “Will you buy me a drink?” Try smiling, tilting your head and saying, “I dunno. Last time I did that a woman tried to take advantage of me later.”
This is important because you’re not saying “Yes” or “No.” You’re steering the interaction in a different direction, one where you are in control.
The girl will either laugh, look at you funny, or ask you to tell the story. If she asks for a story, give her a good one. If not, say. “Think it’ll work again this time?”
You’d be surprised how often women like this and say yes, probably, or pull up a chair and let’s talk about it. If she says no, tell her it’s good to meet someone who’s honest, shake her hand and walk away. Those women have a strange tendency to seek you out later in the evening.
Suffice to say, you’ve turned this interaction into a positive for yourself, taking the power away from someone who might just be using you!
Never Be Ignored By A Girl Again, Part 1
